What Do I Want To Be When I Grow Up?

 

I am 35 years old, married, mother of two and I'm still wondering what I want to be when I grow up.  I'm sure I'm not the only one with this problem.  For most people who can't or don't go to college immediately after high school,  get thrown into the working world and squeeze ourselves in any where we can fit and make a living.  And while we may not love the job, we may be content or lazy enough to stick with it.  Until one day we wake up and realize that we are wasting our life.  We had dreams.  We had goals....What happened?

For me, I knew exactly what I wanted to be when I was 18.  When I graduated I enrolled in college and I was going to be a writer.  Then life intervened and college was put off a year.   I moved to another state and enrolled in West Virginia University.  Spent one semester there, got accepted to their school of journalism and then no more money.

Two years later I moved to Maryland and enrolled in the local county college.  Still set on being a writer, I signed up for a creative writing class, among other things.  The teacher was such a pompous ass as was my previous professor at WVU and I realized I couldn't make it through this major if I had to deal with these types of people.

I changed my major to photography which I loved.  Unfortunately it was probably the most expensive major I could have chosen, and I wasn't great at it...made A's but I new I didn't have the talent to make a career out of it.

So onto my final interest, Psychology.  I had always been curious as to how the human mind worked and why people in this world were so dysfunctional.  Dysfunction seemed to be all I lived with for so many years of my life and I believe I am very in tune with peoples emotions.  I find myself really wanting to help people see that they have different avenues in life and that they can triumph over the mental scarring caused by life.

I've got a number of credits under my belt, although some are unrelated to a Psychology degree, and I am planning on going back to school next year (after 10 years). I know that I want to eventually get my Doctorate which will tack on to the time I spend in school, and going part-time won't help my time line either.  I had considered changing majors again and getting a degree in business administration which is what I do now, but it is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I torn between living my dream and doing the safe thing for my family.

So, I am going with my heart and living my dream, because in the end...it will be better for everyone. I will be happy and fulfilled, and when Momma is happy, everyone is happy...right?